April Madness

Coachella starts this weekend. But the sports equivalent goes down tonight. Somehow, this Festival Wednesday feels more loaded than an NFL Sunday.

You’ve got NBA teams fighting to punch a ticket on the side stage. The start of the NHL playoffs in the Dance Tent. And Kobe & The Warriors are dual headliners.

It’s April Madness.

There is so much action tonight it feels like we should all have a bracket. But you HAVE to have a plan.

First of all – carbo load and caffeinate. This is not the kind of night where you east coasters can fall out early and miss the action in Cali. It’s just like a concert. Don’t be the guy on a bad trip, puking and passing out in the parking lot just as the big names are coming on. Be front row against the barricades with a lighter in the air and your lady on your shoulders. And be early.

You want a plan? Here’s your plan. 7pm Eastern – the puck drops. Red Wings- Lightning. I don’t care if you don’t dig hockey. Everybody digs playoff hockey or there’s something wrong with you, and especially when it’s being played by a Detroit team that’s been in the playoffs 25 freaking years in a row.

Watch that for an hour, and get a nice dinner- because then it’s time to start channel flipping, or better yet, two-screening. Rangers and Penguins at 8 o’clock, as well as Rockets-Kings in the NBA. Dwight and the “Champs” need this game to get in, they’re playing a Sacramento team with nothing to play for, who they should easily beat – and that’s exactly why they could easily lose.

Settle in, hit a 5-hour, sip a Johnny Walker, do some pushups, get some wrestling- whatever you need. Because the big guns come out at 10:30, and they play simultaneously.

The Warriors host the Grizzlies to try to pass Jordan… And the Lakers host Utah to send off Kobe. Bear in mind, that when Houston loses ERRRRR if the Rockets are shocked by Sacramento, the Jazz will need to beat the Lakers to punch their ticket. So it would leave them fighting for their playoff lives vs. Kobe saying goodbye. As much as they may want to, they can’t just stand around and leave Kobe wide open for 30 jumpers.

That’s great theater. Don’t miss it. Don’t DVR it. Don’t get up early, check some highlights and pretend that you watched it. This is not the concert you want to watch online, and then tell people you were there. You want to tailgate, buy a t-shirt, be in the mosh pit and catch a guitar pick. If there’s been a better midweek sports setlist- I haven’t seen it. For those about to rock, we salute you.

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