Eagles Get Worked

Philly, you know me. I’m not one to over react. So I slept on that trade you made to get the #2 draft pick. And how can I put this? I think you actually pulled off something incredible. I really do. I think the Eagles managed to get worked by the CLEVELAND BROWNS.

Think about that. I have. And I think you just slapped a second mortgage on your future for a rookie quarterback, when you don’t even need one, and you don’t even know WHICH one you’re going to get.

Just days ago, the Eagles scratched Sam Bradford a new deal for 22 mill guaranteed. Last month they landed Chase Daniel to back him up for 12 guarantee. Because that makes sense!

What the hell are you doing, paying Sam Bradford all that crazy money, then bringing in Chase Daniel, only to decide they really don’t like either one of them so you’re going to give up a boatload of picks to move up?

If you want to take a big swing, move up and take a shot on a guy who you think, think, might be a franchise q.b., great: but why pay Bradford all that dough??

Sounds like something the Browns would do. And now next week apparently they’re going to give another huge guarantee to a third dude and you don’t’ even know if he can play. Shoot, they don’t even know his NAME!!

Say what you want about the Rams blowing a boatload of picks to draft at #1. At least they get their choice! The Eagles have to pay pretty much the same price and let another team make the pick for them.

VP of Personnel Howie Roseman straight up admitted yesterday – he’s really not sure who the Rams are taking. Howard – that means you’re not sure who You’re taking. And you just traded 5 draft picks! Jared Goff? Carson Wentz? Eh, whoever the Rams decide is worse is good for us! But don’t’ fret, Philly fan. Because your guy came loaded with sweet metaphors. “It’s like vanilla or chocolate. You know? It’s like pepperoni or sausage.”

No it isn’t. First of all- I’m sure the very patient, very understanding Eagles fans are EXTREMELY reassured when the bossman tells them – they may get vanilla ice cream, and they’re okay with that. Nobody likes vanilla more than chocolate. And pepperoni or sausage? It’s not exactly like you’re looking up at Andy Luck and Cam Newton on the board.

Maybe Goff and Wentz will both be hall of famers. Sure. And maybe next year’s NFL MVP will be Sam Bradford. Sausage and Pepperoni are both great- but best believe, if I belly up to Round Table and pay about a thousand dollars for a pie… I better be able to choose my own toppings. The Eagles don’t.

Again – you know it’s bad when you do business with the Cleveland Browns and look like you got swindled. They traded away all those picks to get a franchise QB, and they don’t even get to pick the one they want. Maybe this works out, but get ready for a big fat pie with extra anchovies.

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