It’s not like the injures to Paul and Griffin leave Doc without firepower. Austin Rivers gets big minutes… you know J Crossover is going to get this looks…. But that’s only if Portland even gives them a chance. Because the Blazers may just start hacking DeAndre Jordan when he pulls into the players’ parking lot.
I mean – wouldn’t you? My man shot back to back air balls from the stripe last night. You gotta be kidding me, D. We’ve seen you air ball before. That’ll happen. I guess. We’ve even seen you do it twice in one night. We’ve even seen you air ball a free throw WIDE RIGHT. But never – have we seen back-to-backers.
In a league of freaks, you’re one of the freakier dudes running, so how the hell is that even possible? Is there no adjustment that kicks in? Is there no muscle memory?? We’ve got a world class athlete, with world class coaching and a 7-foot wing span. And he can’t even draw iron with TWO Shots? Can Steve Ballmer scramble his jet to get Rick Barry to LAX? At this point DJ might as well go Granny Style. Because even the fat Dad shooting free throws at the county fair paying 5-bucks a ball to win the giant SpongeBob can hit the rim. And that rim’s rigged to be about half the size of the ball.
Blazers head coach Terry Stotts doesn’t need me to tell him how to do his job… But if I’ve got 12 players, that means I’ve got 72 fouls – and every one of them is getting slapped right on DeAndre’s meat hook, every time down the floor. It’s not like Portland hasn’t done this before. Just back in December, the Blazers put DJ to the line… 34 times. And he missed TWENTY TWO of them!! – and that was when he was still running with CP3. Now that he’s not, there’s no reason not to put DeAndre at the line.
Clips fans – the sky is falling. Your best shot at winning this series is DJ winning the SpongeBob. Quoting Robert himself: “This will be No Problem-O!”
This dude shot 43% from the free throw line in the regular season. At least he dialed in for the playoffs, though. Ehhhhhhh! 32.5 percent for the playoffs. In a weird way, it’s so terrible, that it’s impressive.
Like I always say, give me an A or give me an F, and big dude is failing miserable. All year long and even worse now when it matters most. There isn’t a single reason or scenario whereby an NBA’er should be under 50% from the free throw line. Never mind even that number is horrible, but not to be able to even hit half your free throws is absurd. I don’t even have the words to describe how horrible sub .33 is. Especially in the playoffs.
This post brought to you by Jim Rome.