Heat v. Hornets Is So Funny

Heat v. Hornets may or may not be the most competitive first round series. But it’s definitely the most hilarious. Suddenly, Miami can’t stop losing. And I can’t stop laughing.

If there was even such a thing as “Heat fans” – I would challenge them-  Even you guys can’t tell me you’re not busting up at the idea that while on their way to knocking out the Cavs and wrecking LeBron, they got punked by Charlotte. And now they’re just one more loss away from that happening.

These dudes were going to beat LeBron? They can’t even handle a guy in a ManBUN!

Up 3 games to 2, fresh off a win in Miami’s head… Bunned-up Jeremy Lin and the Hornets are so far in the Heat’s heads. You can hear it when they talk. Eric Spoelstra’s reaction after the loss “Welcome to the playoffs. The playoffs just started now. One team beat somebody on the road. Now it gets real.”  

Coach – It got real almost a week ago when you lost your first game. Because your guys haven’t won one since.

I love a coach who has lost 3 straight playoffs games convincing himself that the playoffs are just now starting. No, Spo – they’re just about ending.

The Heat are checking off all the boxes for a team passing out right in front of us. Delusions that things are going just fine. Nonstop chirping about the officiating. And ridiculous motivational strategies as the whole house is collapsing.

Way of Wade told ESPN his plan is to tell his teammates about another time they were down 3-2, back in 2012 to Boston, when they won the last two games and advanced. Cool story, bro. Problem is – you had LeBron back then. The only reason you advanced is because he went for 45 and 15. And that was to get to the NBA Finals. This is to get to the conference Semi Finals.

You whimsically spinning yarns to your teammates about the glory of the LeBron years… would be like the Hornets in the other locker room saying – Man, we’d have already closed this series out if  Zo, Grandmama and Mugsy were here! They’re all gone. LBJ has nothing to do with you. LeBron’s sitting around the house shooting selfie videos. You guys are the star of a snuff video.

And if that’s your best strategy as you head into Game 6, then the next time you see LeBron is going to be in a month when you guys saddle back up on the banana boat.

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