It’s the question scientists and sci-fi geeks have been asking for decades: If humans could travel through time… where would you go? Some say they’d see the dinosaurs. Some say they’d travel back and stop World War 2. Gronk said if he had a time machine he would travel to modern day Florida.
But you know where none of us would go? To 1995 to re-watch the Mike Tyson Peter McNeeley fight.
But that’s the great Internet conspiracy. Somebody went back and watched the YouTube of that ridiculous fight, and spotted what appears to be a smart-phone in the crowd. It looks like there’s somebody using an iPhone to take a picture of Iron Mike. They’re holding it vertically, the lens is in the upper corner- it does look a LOT like an iPhone.
So naturally, the Internet concludes that it must be a time traveler.
I disagree. Not because I refuse to believe there’s secret time traveling technology that the government is keeping from us. But because if there was, nobody would ever use it to watch Tyson- McNeeley.
That’s what you want to go back in time for… To see a fresh-out-of-prison angry as hell Mike…. Throw a few punches at some guy who looked like he worked at a liquor store?
Even if you were the biggest boxing fanatic ever… If you get into the DeLorean, you’d go to Ward-Gatti 1 in 2002. You’d go to the Rumble in the Jungle in ’74. You’d go to the Thrilla in Manilla in ’75. You’d go to the Fan Man fight in ’93. You would never go to Tyson- McNeeley. That fight was a total sham.
What was this time traveler’s next stop- Mayweather Pacquiao in 2015? Hell no. There was a better chance that Pete McMeat was going to turn Tyson’s lights out that night … Than there is of a time traveler with an iPhone going back to watch that fight.
And I just love that all the gadget dweebs have ID’d multiple 1995 era cameras that were ahead of the game and resemble the one in the video. Of course. Because with all the times and places you could visit with a time machine, not even McNeeley himself would go back to that night.
I’m betting he would go back to 2006 when he was arrested for driving the getaway car in a Walgreens robbery. Just a guess.
So you know me, I love a good conspiracy theory. But if you believe a time traveler shot through the cosmos to see Mike v. McNeeley… Then guess what… YOU GOTTA BIG DUMP IN YA PANTS!
This post brought to you by Jim Rome.