Everybody loves beer. Everybody wants muscles. Nobody wants to have beer muscles.
Scientists have proven that with each beer you put down, your brain emits a signal that tells you you’re getting tougher. As you get drunker, you swear you are getting stronger. Put down enough rounds, you’ll become convinced you and your boys are the Klitschko Brothers.
And some Warrior fan must have been blasted enough to think he was Bones Jones, because he tried to fight Charles Barkley.
According to USA Today’s Sam Amick, an enraged Warriors fan at a hotel bar was so upset that Barkley picked the Thunder to win the series, that he challenged Chuck to a fight, and hotel security had to step in.
And those security just saved dude’s life. Unless that Warriors fan happened to be named Charlie Oakley, that would have ended really badly.
And make no mistake, it would have started. If we know one thing about Chuck- it’s that he’ll go. How do I know? Just 2 months ago he told me.
And I want to know how hammered you have to be to try and fight Charles Barkley. Of all the ex-players working in the media, you want to throw with the roundmound. I mean, Reggie Miller, John Barry, Kenny the Jet. At least your wasted brain might convince you those dudes are in your weight class.
But Chuck?? This is a guy who used to bang with Karl Malone and Anthony Mason on the low block. You really think you can handle him in a bar? He beat up Bill Laimbeer. He traded with Oak. The guy fought SHAQ. He’s thrown with 7 footers. You’ve thrown back 7 & 7s.
And this moron is lucky Chuck didn’t throw him through a window. We know snitches get stiches. And beer muscles get bandages.
This post brought to you by Jim Rome.