Quick rundown of what went down in the NBA over the weekend: The Cavs lost another game and this series lost its damn mind.
A LeBron step over. Another Draymond groin shot. A suspension. Klay saying Bron got his feelings hurt. Mo Speights tweeting a baby bottle. Steph’s WIFE going in on twitter. #lmaolebron TRENDING on twitter.
I said it after Game 3. If the Cavs win again, THEN we have a series. They didn’t. And now we have a circus. And Draymond will be having a seat tonight. And get this straight – he’s not out for Game 5 because he backhanded LeBron in the package he’s out because he jump kicked Steven Adams in the package. AND he hit him in the same spot with a knee lift.
Groin a guy once, shame on you. Groin a guy 3 times in 3 weeks – the Association has to sit you. Andrew Golota starting a brawl with lowblows to Riddick Bowe thinks Dray has to keep his punches up.
Clearly the NBA had Draymond on a Zero Tolerance Coconuts policy, he broke it, he has to pay for it. So no, Warriors fan, he’s not suspended for a swat in the jewels. He’s suspended for THREE of them.
And don’t get me wrong – I don’t blame Draymond for getting bent. LeBron threw a drink in his face. The step-over move is the NBA version of flicking a dude in the earlobe and asking what he’s going to do about it.
Quoting Mo Speights “If somebody put they (“Balls”) on your head, what are you supposed to do.”
I know what Charles Barkley would have done. Because the Chuckster says that Draymond has “a moral obligation to punch him” and “you’re supposed to pop him in the junk if he steps over you like that.”
It’s hilarious. This whole thing is hilarious. The fact that the Warriors are one win from going back-to-back and ONCE AGAIN I’m talking about an adult getting hit in the junk is hilarious.
Crotch shots and blowouts have been the calling card of these NBA playoffs. But considering Draymond already had 3 flagrants in the playoffs and was on the verge of a suspension, he probably should have just gotten in LeBron’s face instead of flailing at his grapes.
I get that he had the quote “moral obligation” – and I love Draymond Green, I think he is an extremely unique player, and I want him on my team, but given his track record, he really left the NBA no choice… You can only allow for so many 3 Stooges Moments before you have to sit a guy. And sure, I love a good conspiracy theory as much as the next guy. And believe me nothing would make me happier to interview Davy Stern and ask him if the league popped Draymond a game for popping LeBron in the junk so it could extend the series; but Davey is probably rotting somewhere in retirement so I guess I won’t get the opportunity.
And that’s what this is: a great opportunity for the Cavs. Green makes life difficult for LeBron, and is pretty much the reason Kevin Love was benched. And trust me Kyrie threw him a nice little party when he found out Green wouldn’t go tonight. Cleveland’s entire big three benefits from that.
But in the end, it’s probably not going to matter. Not when Golden State is still that much better, and now has a huge chip on its shoulder as a result.
You can argue Green got what he had coming to him, but so will the Cavs and LeBron. Another beatdown in the NBA FINALS. STRIVE FOR GRAPE SHOTS OUT THERE, CUZ!
This post brought to you by Jim Rome.